v Masonians (H): 7 November 2009

And there we go again. Our chronic availability problems came back to haunt us as we managed to find our ranks reduced to barely half a team - and this for a home game. But, buoyed by the presence of 2 likely looking guest players from our generous and numerous opponents, and further boosted by our very special NPL secret weapon (read on), we pushed back in good heart.

We did ok to start with. Our 2 youngsters, Richard S and David R, began as they carried on - efficiently and skilfully. And with the midfield bolstered by the dashing skills (and no small dose of grit, too) of our secret weapon - the Ladies Captain (woohoo!) - all was well for a while. But then, damn and blast, the sight of a somewhat exposed GBB was all they needed to start pinging them in from all angles. And hard though we fought, our backboard was soon vibrating more regularly than Rolf Harris's didgeroo (Eeuuww, what a horrible image! Must you? Ed). Outnumbered and outfought, it was another sorry first half tale:

HALF TIME: 'Dogs 0 Masonians 5

Did it get any better after half time? Did it hell. It didn't take Masonians long to take advantage of a 4 on 0 breakaway and walk the ball round the GBB, then for a single player to do something similar unopposed from half way. Another one probably went in (did it matter by now?) before, suddenly, it all changed. Curt and Donald D turned up, added that missing something and, hey presto - a genuine contest! Ebb and flow it went for the last 15 or so, during which time we actually dominated possession and territory and, bar one further sloppy piece of defending, kept them at bay. And, best of all, in among the 'Dogs attacks, David R stepped up for a very smart finish to put us on the scoreboard at least. An excellent goal, his first for NPL but surely far from his last. Just time for Richard S to come back and produce some wonderfully composed defending to ensure his poor old man didn't concede double figures then, hallelujah, it was all over.

FULL TIME: 'Dogs 1 Masonians 9

I know, I know. But don't forget we did something similar last autumn and yet, within a couple of weeks, had won our first game of the season and kept a clean sheet. What did we learn today? That our youngsters are shaping up well, that the Ladies' Captain is a splendid Grass Conference player, that we get hammered with 7 regular players or fewer, but that when we have a full kennel of 'Dogs, we are competitive.

OOWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Come back, you missing 'Dogs, we need you!

WINSTON OF THE WEEK: An unusual award this week, made by our captain - and 2 of their players, who thought he had an absolute stormer. Take a bow, Richard S. You may have been the youngest 'Dog on the field by a distance, but you were quite brilliant in attack, midfield and defence. More of the same please. And an honourable mention also to our other BullPup, David R for his first NPL goal - and what a cracker it was, too.

v BURNT ASH (A): 31 October 2009

Opening game against Desperados: tick! Then Purley away: tick! Followed by Wallington at home: tick! With the Kenley festival on 24 October, that only leaves us one more Saturday to negotiate in October. And it's half term on 31 October - so here's hoping for a nice fixture nearby, to tempt those not away on holiday to help swell the 'Dog ranks. So what did we get - Burnt Ash away. Hang on, isn't that the game with the 125 mile round trip? ...Tick.

And so it was that 4 adult 'Dogs, 3 young 'Dogs (including Thomas Milton making his full debut) and 2 guests lined up against 10 good men and true of Burnt Ash. Frankly, it didn't have the feel of that first elusive win of the season, and so it turned out. We made them work very hard, with brilliant performances from Mike, Nigel and Martin pretending to be 5 players at the back, some vocal and physical gymnastics from the GBB, and great efforts from our 2 guests (see below). but, for all that, we couldn't help but concede and reached half time, having played really well in adversity, at:

HALF TIME: Burnt Ash 3 'Dogs 0

Amazingly, we took the fight to them for much of the second half. and the highlight of the game - indeed, of many a game - was a shockingly precocious run from Richard Cruden. Taking the ball 10 yards inside their half and left of centre, he jinked his way past 3 (or was it 4?) defenders before slotting an ice cool finish past their 'keeper. 3-1, and no less than we deserved. Sadly though, our gallant 9 couldn't keep up with their well drilled 10 and we conceded twice more. Their fourth goal being a particularly good example of the 'home umpire' theory. GBB, tussling for a loose ball with a forward, was chopped off balance by a stick over the ball, then chopped to the ground in the same way and lay watching as the striker then put the ball into the now empty goal. Didn't change the result, but it did sort of add insult to defeat.

FINAL SCORE: Burnt Ash 5 'Dogs 1

A very, very odd thing to say but we played really, really well. Huge thanks to Rick and Mark for guesting for us with such obvious pleasure - much appreciated, guys. And thank you to Burnt Ash for lending us players to ensure we all had a decent game of hockey. Finally, hats off to our 3 youngsters, Richard, Thomas and David Rees. Completely unfazed by the occasion or the space on a not fully populated pitch, they all played wonderfully well and gave more than a hint that NPL has much to cherish and look forward to in our upcoming young talent.

v WALLINGTON: 17 October 2009

Aw, come off it - you're having a laugh! Fresh from our habitual frustrating defeat against the Desperados, followed by our ritual hammering at Purley, what did the Conference fixture list throw at us next, by way of light relief? Wallington at home. Sheesh!

But, yet again, we started brightly. Kevin and Paul devilled away, showing what really good acquisitions they are (on and off the field), Peter controlled things in the middle, and with a mixture of youth and experience all playing their part - except at the back where experience and experience was in residence, we got them huffing and blowing for the first 15. But then, we realised that they hadn't really been huffing and blowing, just warming up. And so with a few lethal blows just inside the post and a couple of canny uses of their much loved Willy (if you see what I mean), we suddenly found ourselves on the end of a highly unflattering half time score of:

HALF TIME: 'Dogs 0 Wallington 5

Last week, we had turned it on but not scored when 4 down at half time. This time, we really turned it on. They continued to create chances but, given half a sniff, our GBB tends to get in among Wallington and the goals against dried up. And then - but what was this?! Ladies and Gents, I give you not one (a smart reverse stick finish from Donald), not two (another sharp finish in front of goal), but three (an unstoppable Satbir Special from a short corner), yes three 'Dog goals in quick succession, without reply. 5-3 with just over half the second half gone. Woo-hoo! Game on! Suddenly, the unthinkable just threatened to become the thinkable. But then, just as suddenly, the fun was over. They picked up the pace and, despite some valiant defence, we conceded 2 flicks, both of which were despatched brilliantly a whisker inside the woodwork. Still we pressed and, with a bit of luck, might have scored at least one more. But it was not to be so, at the end of a second half where we had beaten them fair and square 3-2, we nonetheless finished second best overall, by the reasonably illustrative scoreline of:

FINAL SCORE: 'Dogs 3 Wallington 7

What a game. Wallington played brilliantly at times, mostly because they can and do, but sometimes because they had to. We fought tooth and nail and, if this team plays again and plays like that, will be more than a match for most other opposition. With just one more difficult gamne to negotiate before our horror show October gives way to gentler contests in November and beyond, the 'Dogs - as so often - finished well beaten, but with great hopes of better times to come.

v PURLEY (A): 10 October 2009

Life, eh? Don't mention it, as Marvin the Paranoid Android tells us. There are few certainties in life, but here are 3 for you:

1/ Income Tax demands always come just when you don't want them

2/ Toast always falls butter and jam side down on the carpet

3/ 'Dogs always play badly at Purley, concede shedloads of silly 1st half goals and lose heavily.

So it didn't look good when our 2nd game of the season duly took us 'Dogs off to one of our many nemesises - no, erm, nemeses - no, erm let me think about this one. Got it: ...to one of those places we never seem to do very well.

But as in our game the previous week, we started well enough. Then, it was as if we had remembered that the Income Tax demand had arrived unexpectedly and that the carpet fibre-laden jam and butter hadn't tasted very nice on the morning toast and (What the hell are you on about? ED) bish, bash, bosh, crump. Yup, quicker than you can say 'uh oh: much more of this and our captain will kill someone' we shipped our habitual 4 goal nightmare of a first half:

HALF TIME: Purley 4 'Dogs 0

Last year, after conceding 4 soft first half goals at Purley, we proved it wasn't a fluke by conceding a fifth early after the break. But not this year. Buoyed by the nonchalance of players well versed in turning it on when 4-0 down (ha! Pity you can't turn it round when you're 4-0 down. ED), we dominated much of the second half with some lovely stuff but couldn't find a goal. But Purley is as Purley must so, 2 minutes from time, we duly conceded another frustratingly avoidable goal to finish well and truly beaten:

FULL TIME: Purley 5 'Dogs 0

A wag of the canine tail in the direction of Jimmy who, having come many a mile, put in an honest and hardworking performance as umpire. Frankly, he didn't deserve the constant moans and backchat he got from at least one of our thoroughly ungracious hosts (you played well guys and beat us fair and square - but lose the attitude, eh?). Given that the chief culprit then studiously ignored and walked straight past the outstretched hand of one of our youngsters after the final whistle, too, (...nice example, feller) it wasn't frankly, a very memorable day. But we will welcome them back to Fortress Teddington later this year for a rematch, because that's the 'Dog way.

v Desperados (H/A): 3 October 2009

Yes, it was that time of year again. When the smells of rotting leaves and distant bonfires mingle playfully with a powerful draft of Ralgex, it can mean only one thing. Winter is i-cummin in and the Bulldogs are creaking their way uncertainly into another season.

Undeterred by disasters past, a generous smattering of Old 'Dogs found their ranks swelled by the presence of 2 new thoroughbreds to the kennel: Paul and Kevin. Could they be the ones to teach us New Tricks, in our traditional season opener: the controversial and undeserved defeat to the Desperados? And, for a while, it all looked very good. We more than matched them early on and had the temerity to take the lead, with the honour of the first goal of the new season falling to Satbir's unerring aim from the flick spot, after Ricky had been pulled up for doing something in goal our own GBB would never be caught doing. Then, just to show we hadn't lost our knack during the summer layoff, we conceded a soft equaliser, before restoring our lead to go in at half time:

HALF TIME: 'Dogs 2 Desperados 1

By now the dynamic had shifted a bit. Jiji had realised his injured leg wasn't that bad and, with Bobby Abdulla alongside him, proceeded to take us on while the Desperados watched on. And, hard though we fought, a soft equaliser from Harminder was followed up by a cruel 3rd goal then a counterattacking, game settling 4th as we got caught on the break right at the end, pressing for a deserved equaliser. But there was much to commend in this 'Dog performance. The 2 new boys showed loads of skill and endeavour, while Peter, Satbir and Martin M picked up where they left off last spring. And with Paul Mangat also being tempted into 'Dog colours, good days surely will come when we can field our full side against the less strong of our Conference opponents, or those who don't pack their ranks with ringers for the day because they can't stand being beaten by us.

FINAL SCORE: 'Dogs 2 Manchester Ci- sorry, Desperados 4